These surprises may include body growth and physical changes and sometimes a heightened self-awareness and or self-consciousness about a changing body. Many middle-schoolers also begin to place a growing importance on peer thinking and activities with friends, and as a result may choose to distance themselves a bit from family. Their previous interests often can get discarded in favor of new ones and for the desire for new experiences. Often new social connections can become paramount over studies and attention given to schoolwork. While students seek more independence, parent guidance is more critical than ever as you help them connect and balance more freedom with increasing responsibilities.
With these things in mind, we have a few recommendations to make as you enter the new school year. We are also always eager to learn what has worked for families in the middle school years so please comment below and share your insights.
Here are some tips we've found helpful:
- Keep reasonable, but firm guidelines for study, sleep, family mealtimes etc. Good habits begin at home with clear communication and expectations. Some families schedule a "back to school" family meeting to formalize this and get everyone in sync before the new year begins.
- Parents should connect and consult with other parents in your child's class to avoid the ‘you’re the only parents who don’t let me...’ It's comforting to learn how like-minded most parents are.
- Technology use is a growing area of interest for middle-schoolers. Please be aware that not everyone at EMMS or EMHS has a smart phone or cellphone even. Many students do not and many parents have chosen to not provide these for their children. Your child may think otherwise, but again, consulting with other parents will tell you what is the norm for your child's peers and what is right for your family.
-If your child is interested in having social media accounts, remind them of the rules of account ownership that each social media application account has (most require that users are aged 13 or older). We highly recommend that parents install parental controls on phones and monitor text and chatting. Screen time can control the amount of time children spend online as well as set times when certain applications can be used. Contact your cellphone provider for text monitoring services.
-Remind your middle-schooler that parents have the right and responsibility to limit and monitor their child's "online lives." Be sure that their privacy preferences are set to high. Ask for their passwords and let them know that you will check their gadgets from time to time. Apps that can be particularly troublesome and/or prone to online bullying and inappropriate online presence are Snapchat, Kik, and Instagram. Linked here is a handy guide to several of apps that parents may wish to familiarize themselves with before giving permission to use.
-If your child is having a tough day and would like someone to talk during school hours, they can always pop in for a chat with our Middle School counselor Lindsey Fast. Mrs. Fast may be reached at 236-6004 or fastl@emhs.net. We would prefer that parents and students not text each other during the school day. Students may tell school personnel if they need help or are having a rough day and need to talk to someone instead of trying to text parents. In the case of an emergency, parents can always call the front office or Mrs. Fast for assistance. Middle school students can also ask permission to use the front office phone to contact a parent should an emergency arise.
-Middle School is a great time to make new friends - both of the same sex and opposite sex. Healthy social behaviors are learned more by good group activities with a variety of peers rather than by pairing off and isolating from other friends. Therefore, talk to your student about relationships and try to discourage your student from "dating" or "going out." Again, dating is not the norm at EMMS or EMHS, so encourage your student to establish strong and varied friend groups and save themselves from the social burdens of dating until they are developmentally and emotionally ready for a relationship.
-Speaking of group activities, help your child be inclusive with social gatherings to avoid forming cliques as much as possible. If having large numbers of children at your house is daunting and unfeasible, try doing joint birthday celebrations, etc. with other households, for example. Our happiest school classes are those whose students deliberately practice the concept of inclusiveness. Children often need encouragement and modeling with this - so help them learn the benefits of broad friendships.
-Encourage your child to choose a club or other co-curricular activities to help make new friends and discover new interests.
·-Know that some children may experience what seems like ‘life and death’ social scenarios to them. Keeping calm, listening and proposing other perspectives will help them work through the situation. Hopefully, with your reassurance the situations will resolve, but if not, Mrs. Fast is always available to provide assistance as needed.
-Refrain from rushing in to help too soon – problem solving helps build resilience. Give your child space and time to think problems through.
-Similarly, protecting children from all possible failures and consequences deprives them of developing very necessary skills for growth.
-I found the American Girl "Smart Girl Guides" to be quite helpful for my daughter in preparing for middle school. They are available on Amazon and we have several copies with different topics at school. Unfortunately there aren't any "Smart Boy Guides" yet.
Middle school students are in a prime exploratory mode...still children, yet constantly developing new interests that may lead to later life vocations and hobbies. Therefore our middle school curriculum is designed with exploration in mind.
To best prepare students to leave our school with maximum self-management skills useful in life, , we ‘ease’ them along by expecting a little more of them with each rising grade level. ‘Gifted behaviors’... such as organization, completion of tasks, advanced planning, efficient use of time, to name a few – set the tone of objectives we aim for in increased responsibility. A broad overview of the three grades looks something like this:
6th Grade: Students are usually transitioning in from an elementary one teacher/one classroom
format to a two teacher/two room setting for core subjects. The sixth grade teachers send out regular joint email communications to parents, but students are also expected to pay attention to assignments and record them in their planners. Students should pay attention to school announcements that are read by the teachers (examples of important announcements include: play try-out times and changes in schedule). These announcements are also posted at the main office and often complement what is reported in our weekly all-school e-letter (the Blazin' Bulletin) or the online school calendar. New students and parents do well to give all these communications close inspection. Grade reports are issued quarterly for every 6th grader.
7th Grade: Students begin using hall lockers (in place of 6th grade room cubbies) and change classrooms/teachers with the bell-tone. Grades are issued quarterly with the exception of grades falling below 70% by mid-quarter. For these, mid-quarter reports are sent to parents. Calls (and emails) may be made in between as well. Following Math 7, students will be recommended for Algebra I or Algebra 1, part 1 on the basis of Math 7 grades, scores on an algebra readiness test, and teacher observations. Additionally, if students successfully complete Math 7 and Life Science 7 with a 90% or higher in each and pass a physical science competency, they will be eligible to take Earth Science in eighth grade instead of ninth grade (and will take biology in their ninth grade year).8th Grade: Grade reports, as in 7th grade, are issued quarterly with the exception of grades falling below 70%. Parents will continue to receive mid-quarter reports on these through 12th grade. Likewise, calls and emails back and forth are encouraged in between. Students are encouraged to take the responsibility to call or email their teachers with questions.
Students will have access to Chromebooks to use during class and an internal email account beginning in 6th grade. Students can email teachers and other students but not those outside of the "emhs.net" domain. They (and you) will sign a form at the beginning of the year which details our online use policy so that expectations are clear about how technology is to be used at EMS.
We hope this information on Middle School has been helpful to you and begins important conversations for your family as you plan for a successful year ahead. Please do not hesitate to contact me at 236-6000 or yutzyr@emhs.net if I may assist you in any way. I look forward to getting to know you and your students this year!
Rebecca Yutzy, Middle School Team Coordinator
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